Christmas wish

Before Christmas maam is bringing Christmas tree. She tell me Sally when we are moving to Dubai they are not letting me bring Christmas tree in my luggage. they say it is not allow. She say she have very big Christmas tree with lights and she is giving it away to her friend. Now in Dubai she is having smaller Christmas tree so she is not happy. She say Sally how I wish I have my big tree. But even her small Christmas tree is bigger than me. Her big Christmas tree at home must be like the tree I am seeing in the mall. 

So many days before Christmas when we are going to mall we are seeing the big Christmas tree. And listening to music about santa and snow. It is like Christmas is starting in November. But for me Christmas is starting on December 16 when simbang gabi is starting. In my home country we are going to church for nine days before Christmas. That is simbang gabi. We go in the morning very early and make wish for all nine days. If you do this then your wish come true. Over here in Dubai there is no chance for simbang gabi. But every day I am praying and making my wish.

Maam is making Sara and Rayan make their Christmas list for Santa. She call it Santas wish list. Rayan is still believe that Santa is coming. Sara is knowing that Santa is really maam and sir. Maam tell Sara that if she tell Rayan there is no Santa then Sara not getting any gifts. So Sara is also doing pretend for Rayan that Santa is coming.

On Christmas day one of the gift that Sara is getting this really big headphone for her ipod. Beat headphone she is calling it. She is so happy full day she is wearing the headphone and singing so loud my head is paining. And Rayan is getting speaker for his ipod. Now you imagine this situation. Rayan is playing music on ipod speaker and singing loud. Full day opa gangman style. Then Sara is singing loudly I'm going to scream and shout and let it all out. Both singing different song. My head is paining so much. Maam is laughing and saying oh no Sally what I have done. both these children are going mad. I want to tell maam even I am going mad.

Maam is giving me cash this year. She say Sally you buy what you want I do not know what to give you. I want to tell maam to buy ear plug for my ear. And panadol for my headache. But I am quietly putting the money away. 

I know I will not buy anything. I will keep it. Save it. Maybe then my simbang gabi wish of living with my son in my own house in my home country can come true. Maybe one day.

rain and sun

Last week it is raining here in Dubai. Not little rain. Lot of rain. Rain like I am seeing in my home country. Everyone is getting so excited. Children are running outside. Rayan is singing song about rain. Its raining its pouring the old man is snoring. Rain rain go away come again another day. Everyone is so happy. Then I am going to my room. There is water everywhere.

I am leaving my room window open. All the water is coming inside my room. My full bed is wet. The floor is wet. The wall is wet. I dont know what to do. Maam will be so angry with me. I quickly start doing mopping. I put the fan on for my bed to be dry. It is so cold but I am scared to go outside the room. If I go outside and maam maam is finding out I am dead. 

Then maam is shouting Sally Sally come quick I need you. I am running out of my room and going upstairs. Maam is having fit. Her ceiling is leaking. There is water everywhere. Maam is saying this stupid new house so many problem. in our old house there was no problem like this.

I am doing mopping. Maam is putting bucket under the water. Then she see water falling somewhere else. She is moving bucket there. Then the old spot is leaking again. She is moving bucket. Then she say Sally I give up. thank god it does not rain often in Dubai.

I tell her maam even in my room the water is coming in because I leave window open. She say dont worry Sally we will dry everything. I tell her my bed is wet. She tell me tomorrow it will be so sunny again and you can put your mattress in sun to dry and everything will be ok. I am surprise maam is not more angry that I am not closing the window in my room. 

Next day in paper there are so many picture of rain. Everywhere there is water. Like flood. Because Dubai not getting much rain if it rain little bit more everything get flooded. I am thinking instead of building the taj mahal in dubai they have to put better gutter and drain. So it does not flood. But who will listen to my idea? It is only raining one time in a year in Dubai. taj mahal will make lot of people come to Dubai every day to see it. taj mahal idea will win. I think it is stupid idea.

The rain is now gone. Maam is calling man to fix leak in her room. He say everything have to be full dry before he can do any work. Maam laugh. She say to him there is lot of time to fix it. It will not rain like this again for so many years.

My lucky rain is coming and giving problem for maam and me. But I still feel my rain is still lucky for me. Because maam is not angry with me when I am leaving window open. Because after the rain the sun always shine. and everything will be ok again.

Real big dream

Sara is obsess these days with Bella and Edward. From twilight. Full time she is watching first movie of twilight. I also like to watch movie with her if I am free from my work. She is waiting to see the latest Twilight movie. Sara say to me Sally Edward is soooo handsome. His skin is sooooo glowy. I dont tell Sara that I am finding the glowy skin very funny. If I say that to Sara she is getting mad. Because she is full time dreaming of Edward.

I have a new friend in this new house. She is living same street as me. Her name is Vicky. Short for Victoria. She tell me Sally my name is Victoria. Queen Victoria. But you can call me Vicky. She is just coming back from Manila from her vacation. She tell me this new movie that is coming out in Philippines. Tiktik. It is like filipino twilight. Instead of vampire it is about this monster tiktik. 

When we are small we are always scared of this tiktik and now they are making movie about it. I tell you why we are scared. The tiktik like to eat babies who are in the stomach of pregnant mother. I dont want to see this movie because when I think of this I want to vomit. It is so scary.

I miss Lilibeth but Vicky is funny. Full time she is reading tsismis magazine. She is bring back magazine from Manila. Also all these pocket book and she is giving me also. She say Sally I love Dingdong Dantes. He is the actor in this movie Tiktik. She tell me Sally you see one day Dingdong will be my husband. I am laughing. I tell her Vicky how that can be? you are living inside your dream. She tell me Sally you see my dream will come true one day.

Vicky have full information on Dingdong. She show me his picture in this ad in magazine. For Belo Men. To keep his skin fair and white. She take his picture and give it kiss. She say Sally he is mine you will see. I am Queen Victoria and he is my King. We will live happily ever after in a big palace. She say Sally you will not laugh at me when my dream comes true.

I know I say before that I have big dreams also. but this kind of big dream is stupid. Vicky will never meet Dingdong. They can be together only in their dreams. This kind of big dream can never come true. Because it is not possible for it to become real.

My big dreams are real. That I can marry. That I can live with my son. That I can have my own house in my home country. That I can become little bit famous by my blog. That my son will have a good life. All my dreams can come true some day. with my own hard work. 

Big dreams can become real dreams but you have to do hard work to make them come true. Otherwise they are like that big palace of Queen Vicky and King Dingdong. A big palace in the sky.

New house

Did you miss me? I have not been able to write for one month. I tell you why. Maam and sir is moving their house. We are now having one more floor in the house. And more bedroom and bathroom. And swimming pool. I dont know why maam is wanting to move. She is full time behind sir to move. She say I want bigger house I want bigger house I wish I have bigger house. Finally her wish is coming true.

One day she come tell me Sally we are moving. I am getting so scared. I think she is leaving Dubai. Maam say dont worry Sally you are coming with us. We are going to bigger house. your room will also be bigger.

Then she say Sally we have to pack everything in this house. So full time when I finish my work of cooking and cleaning I am doing packing. Like I am packing full kitchen. It is so difficult to do packing of kitchen. Maam giving me paper and she making me wrap every glass and cup in paper. Then put it in a box. Then close the box. Then write on the box. I tell maam why I have to do this when new house is only 5 min distance from this house? I tell her I put everything in laundry basket and maam can drive car. I keep laundry basket on my lap. Maam say Sally you know how many trip we will have to make with the laundry basket like that? 

She say Sally if Sir company is moving us then they pay for someone to pack. but because we have to pay ourself for this move we have to do the packing. Why she say we I dont know. What she is meaning is I Sally have to do all the packing.

Every day in the evening Sir is taking few box to the new house. Then one day the big truck is coming and we are moving everything else. I am happy this house is not that much far from old house. So I still meet my friends but I am so sad because my Lilibeth is not next door to my house. But still. If we were going far like to jumerah or bur dubai or something I would die. 

My new room is nice. It is little bit bigger than my old room. Maam is buying for me bigger cupboard to put my things. Now when I open the door of my room I am not banging into the bed. Bathroom is also nice. In old house the shower is above the potty so everytime I am doing bath the whole potty is getting full wet. In this house there is different part for shower and potty. 

After we are moving there is no internet for so many days. Du is coming to do tv computer and phone connection but it taking so many days. Maam is not having problem she is reading everything and doing her facebook and email on her iphone. But me I cannot do my blog until Du is finish their work.

Maam has bigger house and lot of plan to do many parties. She say Sally we have lot of pool side party. Lot of party mean lot of work for me. Maam will tell me Sally 12 guest is coming what you will cook? Then she will act like she has made everything. Just because it is her recipe. but I am doing the work. But I cannot say anything.

Bigger house. bigger bathroom. More floors. More rooms. More parties. More work for me.

Fine for life

Last week I am reading the most sad thing in the paper. There is this maid. She is from Ethiopia. Like me she is coming to this country for job. But her maam is not paying her salary for many month. She is trying to do suicide. She is standing in middle of road and hoping that car will kill her.

Such a sad story. But it is not the end of this story. When the police are finding her in the middle of the road they are giving her fine of 1000 dirham. I do not understand how this is going to help her situation. She is not getting salary how she will pay 1000 dirham. She will only want to do suicide again. And why they are not making her employer pay fine for not paying her salary?

Then there is another same story. Again Ethiopian maid. She is only 18. She is trying to kill herself by hanging from tree. Her family in Ehiopia is sending her to dubai for work but she is not wanting to be maid. This girl is wanting to end this life as maid by ending her life. She is also fined 1000 dirham. Imagine this 18 year old girl who wants to end her life. 1000 dirham is like maybe more than her one month salary. If she has to pay this fine she will not be able to send this salary to her family. The same family who is sending her for work when she does not want to come.

How can a fine help these girls? Suicide means that the person is so sad that she wants to end her life. They need help. Not a fine. Making them pay fine will not make their life fine. 

opinion

Today maam is showing me two dress. She say Sally which one look better on me? Pink one or red one? I am not wanting to make maam angry so I tell her both looking good on you. Maam get irritated with me. She say Sally I am asking for your opinion. saying both is not helpful to me. say red is good or pink is bad. dont say both is good. Then she say Sally you must always have opinion. It not always have to be correct opinion but having opinion show that you are thinking of things.

Now you tell me what I say to this? I am not showing her my opinion because I think both dress look bad on maam. How I can tell her the truth? Both dress is too baby for maam. but she is so happy with them I am not wanting to upset her with my opinion. Maam make me so angry sometime. She is not knowing that I have opinion about so many thing she say or do. that I not tell her because she will not like if I tell her truth. 

Anyway I have decide that today I am going to give my opinion on many different thing I am reading in paper. Some story is new. some story is old. I will tell you the story and I will tell you if it is good or bad. my opinion.

The first story is making me laugh so much. I am reading it maybe one month ago. It is about the man with the monkey in his underpant. It is a real monkey that he is trying to smuggle into dubai. This monkey is so small like maybe 7 or 8 inch. It is illegal to have this monkey and it is very expensive. The man is trying to make money by selling his monkey. He is arrested at airport. My opinion is this. It is so funny story but also so sad. Monkey needs to be in a tree. Eating banana. Not in a underpant. I wish the monkey is biting him inside his underpant. Only that will teach him never to put his monkey where it does not belong.

I am reading another story about smuggling. Not monkey but people. They are finding 8 people in a box who are trying to come inside uae without correct paper. How they are fitting 8 people inside a box? It must be a very big box. I want this box for my balikbayan box. My opinion on this story is this.  If you try to fit so many different people in one box the ending will be bad. Even if it is a big box.

Also there was story about this sweeper who is trying to smuggle drug to people in the jail. Now he will be in the jail also. My opinion is this. How stupid is this man that he is doing such a bad thing inside a jail. He has no sense. Smuggling drugs is bad but doing it inside a jail is stupid. I think the sweeper needs to sweep his brain.

Then I am reading another story about smuggling. Police are catching three people for trying to smuggle drugs from dubai to thailand. inside small fridges. My opinion is this. It is better to have an empty fridge than to do smuggling of drugs.

Few days back I am reading that some man is arrest for smuggling drugs inside a laptop. When I read this I am thinking maybe the laptop is having virus and the man think that putting drug inside it will cure the virus. I know you think I am stupid for saying this. I am making joke. Smuggling drugs in a laptop will not cure the virus in your computer. Or in your brain.

See I have so many opinions. Smuggling monkeys in pants is bad. Smuggling drugs in laptops or fridges is bad. Smuggling people in boxes is bad. Smuggling drugs inside jail is bad. So many different stories. But same opinion. Bad.

Maam say she is wanting my opinion. Both her dresses are bad. But I better not tell her. That is also my opinion.

big dream

These days maam and Sara is watching X factor on TV. Even I am watching with them. Last year also we are watching. This year it is not good like last year. I am missing Nicole. you know Nicole? she was a judge last year. She is a pussycat doll. You remember that song dont you think your girlfriend is hot like me? She sings that song. I like that song. We are so proud of her in philippines because she is half filipina. Really. Her father is filipino. Anyway this year she is not there on X factor. Instead they have this girl who is 19 year old. Demi. I think she is not Demi she is dummy. Full time she is saying oh you are so cute oh you are so cute. But she is famous so she is replace Nicole on X factor. even if she have nothing good to say.

Sara tell maam that she want to go on X factor. Maam just laugh and say Sara it is ok to have big dream. Sara say it is not dream I make it come true. She say one day I will be famous and you will be the mother of the famous Sara. Maam is smiling. 

Sara really love music. She is full time listening to music. She say she does not like justin beeber but when his song is coming on radio she is singing loudly. If I was your boyfriend. As long as you lu u u u u uve me. So maam say she is getting ticket for his concert. Even if sara does not like him she want to go for the concert. It is in May. Next year. Maam is buying ticket now. For May 2013. In September 2012. That is how famous Justin Beeber is.

Today I am remembering that my blog birthday was on September 23. My blog is 2 years old. Demi is 19 years old and she is famous. Justin is 18 years old and he is famous. Maybe one day even I will be famous. It is ok to have big dream.

ghost story

My friend Alma tell me there is ghost in her maams house. Why she say this I tell you. When she get up in morning sometimes everything is moving. Like if she is putting one chair in bed room then when she get up that chair is in kitchen. Or the picture frame will be on floor. Not like it is fallen from wall but like someone is taken it and put it on the floor. But most scary is this story. Every day the dog is going near the sofa and barking at the sofa. There is no one sitting but he is barking like someone is sitting on the sofa. And Alma also tell me that the baby in the house is talking to someone but no one know who he is talking to.

When Alma tell me all this story I am not able to sleep. When I am sleeping in the room I am seeing this dog barking at maams sofa. Suppose Almas ghost is coming to my house? I am so scared. For two or three days I am not able to sleep.

Last night I am having so scary dream. I am dreaming of tiyanak. If you are from Philippines you know what this is. It is this scary thing that look like a baby and cry like baby. If someone hear the baby cry they go to help the baby. Then the baby become the tiyanak and it attack the person. And you never see the person again.

Today I am waking up with headache. I tell maam my dream. Maam tell me Sally stop all this nonsense. There is no thing like ghost. When person die he die. gone. forever. How maam is knowing this I do not know. My grandmother say that if person is sad when he die then he cannot go forever. He have to finish his work. That is why he become ghost.

Maam tell me Sally focus your work. Then maam laugh. She say Sally if you are so sure there is ghost  tell your ghost to do your work. Maam sometime make me angry when she make fun of me like this.

But then I am thinking this. Maybe maam say some sense. Housemaid have to do all the house work but no one see her and see how much work she is doing. She live in the house but no one care what she think. It is like she is invisible. or like she have to be invisible. like a ghost.

Maam say tell ghost to do my work. I think housemaid is like a ghost doing the work. Why maam tell me this? Now I am really scared of Almas ghost.

change

When maam is going for vacation Lilibeth is showing me how to read the news on internet. When I am getting little time now I am reading this. It is little bit change for me but I like it. Because it is like reading newspaper but I get news from some other country also. 

Anyway I am reading that in Saudi there is a new rule. That if any man is change hair style to any funny hair style then he can be arrested. Really. I am thinking that if these boys want to do funny hair then they already have punishment. That they are looking funny and everyone will laugh. That is the punishment. No need for more punishment.

I am laughing little bit at this news because it is so silly. but I also feel sad he is not allow to change hair style how he is wanting. Then I am thinking that at least he is allow to show his hair. If he was woman he would have to cover his hair. Even in Dubai the local girl have to do hijab and cover hair but it is not so strict like in Saudi. In Saudi everyone even if you are not local is having to cover hair and full body.

Like that Saudi girl in the olympics. She is doing judo. She is having to wear a swim cap to cover her hair because it is not allow to show hair. And it is not allow in judo in olympic to wear hijab. It is first time she is doing judo in big competition like this. Other wise she is only fighting with her brother. And brother is always winning. This girl is so important because she is first Saudi girl to go in olympics.

She is staying only one minute or something in the fight. She is losing fight just like she is losing fight with her brother at home. She is not winning any medal but everyone is clapping when she is losing. Why? Because she is winning the biggest fight of all. The fight for change. I hope many more girl from Saudi is able to take part in olympics next time. 

Better than the best

This old friend of Sara is coming to stay for one week. From London. Her mother and father is not coming. They are going for vacation somewhere and leave this girl in Dubai in our house. I am not liking this girl. Her name is Sophie. I think even Sara is now not liking Sophie. I tell you why.

If Sara play the piano Sophie say I can play better than Sara. If Sara do swimming Sophie say I can swim better than Sophie. All the time better better better. If Sara is reading a book she say I read this book 3 years ago. Sara says Sophie this is new book how you can read it 3 years ago? Her school is better her car is better her house is better. Everything is better. Maam is also getting little bit irritate with this girl but she is not saying anything.

But past few days lot of things are happening. First Sophie is pinching Sara. Because Sara says she is not wanting to watch some show on tv. Because Sophie wants to watch another show which is better. Pinching with her nails. Sara is not saying anything to maam. but maam see the nail mark on her hand. Sara tell her what happen. Maam say nothing she just put some first aid cream on it and tell Sara she is so sorry. But I know maam is very upset. She tell me Sally it is better if you or I keep eye on Sophie while she is here. 

Then maam is seeing Sophie try to poke Rayan with her nail. Now she see it her own eyes. She say Sophie if you cannot keep your hand to your self you will have to go to your room. Sophie say oh I was only tickling Rayan because he is so cute. Maam say I see the marks on Saras hand Sophie it is better if you keep your hands to yourself. I am surprise maam is so cool and calm. If I was maam and Sophie was doing all this in my house I would slap her face.

Then the next thing is happening. Rayan is finishing making this big lego thing. Ninjago. He love Ninjago. He is spending 3 or 4 days to make this thing. Like this big car thing. Maybe 300 or something piece of lego. Sophie is saying let me see. She is picking it up and throwing it on the floor. All the pieces are falling out. Rayan is starting to cry. Sara say Sophie dont do that it is not fair. Sophie say its only stupid lego he can make it again. I can make it in 5 minutes. 

Rayan tells maam. Maam say Sophie that was not nice. he had spent a lot of time on this. Sophie say I am not throwing it. It just fell from my hand. She is lying. I see how she is throwing it. Maam is looking at all 3 of them. She is getting really upset but still she is quiet. 

She tell Sara and Sophie to go watch TV. Then we help Rayan make it again. After some time we hear Sophie talk to Sara. She say what is big deal? It is only lego. I can make bigger and better lego. He took so long to make it. I can make it in one hour. Your mother hates me. she is always saying dont do this dont do that. my mother never tells me anything she is the best mother.

Maam is now really irritated. She tells me Sally this child needs to be taught a lesson. I am tired of this nonsense. But she is not doing anything. It is like she is waiting. like a lion waits to catch its food.

She is not having to wait for lot of time. When Sara is playing piano again Sophie says Sara you practice so much and you are still making so many mistakes. I dont know how you get this big trophy. I never get any trophy but I can play better than this. 

Maam is reach boiling now. She say Sally I need to end this now. She tell Sophie can you please play the piano for us. Lets see how well you play. Sophie say oh I used to learn but now I dont have a teacher because there is no teacher where I live. Even I know there has to be a piano teacher in London. Maam starts laughing. Sara is also smiling. Rayan also is laughing. Sophie stamp her leg and go upstairs.

I have never seen maam being mean to any child. Lot of children come to the house and they have lot of fun. Maam never tell them anything. Not even to pick up toys or anything. She always say children have to have fun. But this time it is different. She has had enough of this better better better best best best. She has become mean for this mean child. But only for one minute. Now she tell Sara go tell your friend to come down for ice cream.

Sara does not want to go talk to Sophie. But she is good girl. She is not mean to her friend even if her friend is mean to her. And I know why. Sara does not need to be mean because she knows her mother will be there for her. Sophie comes down for ice cream. She eats one bite. She says Sara I dont know how you can pick this ice cream flavour. I pick better flavours. Sara and maam start laughing. Even I start laughing. Maam says so sorry Sophie this is the only flavour we have. Sophie eats all the ice cream.

Sophie have to go back to London yesterday. She is so excited. When her mother come to pick her up she tell everyone that they have tickets for olympics. Best seats. Sophie is showing off to Sara and Rayan. I am going to Olympics I am going to Olympics.

Her mother stay and talk to maam for little time. She say to maam why are you living in this place? It is so hot. It is so dusty. The schools are bad. The weather is bad. You cannot even eat in public. You could be living anywhere. London chicago New York singapore. Anywhere is better than living in Dubai. London is the best. Come live in London. Maam just smiles.

Then she say something really good. I try to remember. She say there will always be some place better. someone better. something better. It does not matter. you dont always have to be the best. as long as you do your best. I want to clap for maam. It is like she is getting the gold medal in the mommy olympics.

After Sophie and her mother go maam say to children lets go buy some new lego. and we can go in the best car and have some best ice cream at the best mall in the world. They all laugh. And I know why maam is better than the best mother in the world. 

will power

Ramadan is going on here in Dubai. Means all Muslim people have to do fasting. Means you cannot eat in public place. Even if you are not Muslim. Really. If you eat in public you can get fined. One time I am going to mall in Ramadan and I am forgetting to spit my chewing gum. Mall security is tell me to spit out otherwise I get fine. I am so scared I am quickly spitting it. But it is better over here in Dubai. In Saudi if they catch you eating in public you are deported. Really. Thats what I am reading in paper.

During Ramadan time a lot of restaurant is closed in the day. Or if they are open the restaurant have black curtain. So you cannot see a person eating. Children are allowed to eat but I think now Sara is not allowed because she is become big girl. You cannot eat in public because if you eat the person who is fasting will also want to eat. And they are not able to eat. So it is not fair for them if you eat in front of them. That is why the rule is like this.

Lot of office places are closing at 3 in the afternoon. Maam is not like to drive at this time. She tell Sir also not to drive at this time. But even in the evening it is not safe for driving. It is not safe until it is time for the iftar. That is when they do break the fast and can eat. Maam say Sally people are so hungry they are rushing to go home to break the fast. It is better not to drive at this time.

I tell her maam if I have not eaten full day even I will be running home to eat. Maam smile and say Sally you will never be in that situation because you cannot go full day without eating. I do not know if maam is making fun of me or she is angry with me because I like to eat.

Few years ago maam is going to Egypt during Ramadan. She tell me this story yesterday. It is so hot. The guide man who is taking them to see everything is fasting. And maam and children and sir do not know that he is fasting. In Egypt they are not having this rule of not eating in public. I am not knowing this. I think everywhere the rule is same but maam say no Sally in Egypt you can eat and drink in public. So maam and sir and children are eating and drinking in front of this man. It is so hot that they are full day drinking water. Rayan is saying more water more water. Maam and Sara are saying more water. Sir is buying more water. And full day this man is fasting. Only at the end of the day he tell maam that he is fasting. 

Maam say she is feeling so bad for him but she cannot change the day. She is not knowing he is fasting or she would not keep saying it is so hot she is so thirsty. She say that this man is passing the biggest test of his faith. He was able to fast even when he sees other people eating and drinking. Even when he hears other people say how hot it is and how thirsty they are feeling. Because he was able to give up his thirst and hunger but not give up. Maam then say this man has so much will power because he has such strong faith.

I have become little fat after coming to work here. I wish I could also do little bit fasting. like dieting. but I am not strong like this guide man. When I see food I have to eat it. I feel so hungry when I see someone else eating food. If I am hot I have to drink water. Maam say Sally it is all about will power. If you have will power to do something you can do it. Then she say something that make me angry. She say Sally when it comes to food you have no will power.

How she can say this I am not knowing. She has never had to give anything up. How can she tell me about will power? Maam does not know anything about my life. After my father is leaving my family we are so poor. We are just happy if we are getting food to eat. I have to have will power because I have to give my brothers and sisters the food from my plate. I have to have will power because I have to leave my family to become ofw. so I can earn more money. So my family does not need will power to give the food on their plate to someone else. Maam does not understand. I have to have will power because I have no other power to help my family.

All these people who are fasting also have so much will power. Their faith will power them for their fast. and their life. Ramadan Kareem.

working again

After I write my last story the computer is again not working. Even my computer angel Lilibeth is not able to fix it. So I have no choice but to wait for sir or maam to come. They are coming back few days back. 

When sir is seeing computer is not coming on he is telling maam to call someone to fix it. Maam is not calling any one. She is fixing herself. That is why I think she is doing something like block it so I am not able to use it when she is gone. But anyway computer is working again. so Sir is happy. And I am happy.

I tell maam that her friend or cousin is not coming when she is going. Maam say Sally it not your worry if they do not come. She say she will drop thing to their house. That make me so irritated. Because full time when maam is gone I am waiting inside the house. And no one is coming. I know maam is lying to me because she is not wanting me to go outside and have fun.

Now they are all back and there is so much laundry. Like they have not wash laundry for so many days while they are going. Not only laundry. There is so much other work also to do. Cooking and cleaning and all. When maam is going I am not doing cleaning everyday because no one is using anything it is all clean.

Only when there was big dust storm and rain storm I am having to do full clean of porch. That is the day my friends  are coming for dinner. Remember I am telling you last time? Everything outside is big mess so we are having to eat inside the house. I am so scared that maams cousin will come but now I know that was a big fat lie.

I have lot of work but it is ok. I am not bored any more. My vacation is over. Children are back. Maam is back. Sir is back. My computer is back. Working again. Like me.

Bored

Maam is gone for her vacation. I am so bored. She is not locking her room this year so I have the computer. But for few days the computer was not coming on. I am trying everyday and it is not working. I think maybe maam is doing something like lock it so I cannot use it. I feel so frustrated.

Maam is not locking the room or computer like last year. but I cannot write because of this stupid computer problem. Yesterday I am telling Lilibeth. Today she is coming here and doing something with computer. I dont know what she do but now the computer is working again. Lilibeth is an angel. Computer expert angel. Because of her I can write today.

It is so quiet here without children. Full day I watch some tv. Then in the evening Lilibeth and I talk outside the gate. I cannot go to park until maams aunty or cousin or friend is coming. I am so bored. One or two times I go out to do something and if they come and I am not there this is my plan. I will tell maam that I go to Choitram for milk. But I have to be careful not to go to mall or anything. Because if maams friend sees me I am dead.

Maria is also in her house alone but she is still not talking to me. because of the God thing. When she sees me giving water to grass or putting the garbage she is turning away. She turn her head or her body so she cannot see me. She cannot look at me because she knows what I tell her is true.

Why I am giving water to the grass when we have gardener? Because gardener is going for his vacation also. He is leaving one boy to do the work but the boy is stupid. He is making full mess of garden. I know maam will be angry when she come back so I try to do little garden work. It is so hot also so I give the grass more water to drink. Also I have nothing else to do so I put water in the garden. I am so bored.

Lilibeth is bringing me some pocket books for reading because I am so bored. I read. I watch more tv. I do little work. I do garden work. But still I am very bored. Now I can do computer also. But how much time to sit on computer? or tv? or reading? I am actually missing maam and children. I have finish all the washing and ironing. Maybe I will do some cooking and put in freezer.

Tomorrow Lilibeth and Alma and Diana say they will come here and we will all eat dinner at my house. in the garden. Maybe Gina also if she is not going for her vacation with her maam. I have made chicken. Lilibeth and Alma and Diana are also bringing something to eat. If maams friend or cousin is coming my friends can  hide or  go out of house from back side. But I am not doing anything bad I am only eating food with my friends. It is like party but not party. More like family eating together. I hope maam will not shout for that. I am excited about tomorrow.

But today after I write I will watch tv and read my pocket book. I am so bored in my jail. Then I think of all the people who are really in actual jail. Workers who are ban. Or girls who have a baby without being marry.

In my jail I am bored but at least I am free.

Break

Maam is going for vacation tomorrow. She will maybe lock her room and computer like when she is going last year. Maybe not. I do not know what she will do. I will only find out when she is going because she is not telling me before. But today she tell me something that make me angry. 

She say that when she go her one friend will come to pick up some books. And her cousin will come for some dress. And some aunty will come for some sweet she is putting in fridge. I ask her maam when they are all coming? Maam say Sally I am not knowing you just be home and they will come. I tell her maam can you tell them to phone me so I know if they are coming. Maam say Sally they come when they can. They not phone you.

I know why she is doing this. She is making all these people come to the house because she think that I am having party in the house. Or maybe that I am going out or doing some part time work. She is so worry that she is making them check. Like detective or spy. I am not liking this. I will be like a prisoner in jail.

Sometime maam make me so angry when she is not trusting me. Because now I am not doing all that bad thing I was doing before. You remember when I go out from kitchen door and not tell maam? For my friend Abilgails farewell? My friend Susan is putting the picture on facebook and her maam is showing my maam the picture. When maam is finding out she is almost fire me. for going without telling. She say she not trust me and she dont know why she is renew my visa.

After that day I have stopped all this. All this sneak around. Because I know my job here is good and my maam is nice. She does not beat me or call me bitch or anything like that. But still I get upset that she is not trusting me. Because I have stopped all this bad thing. See how she is making her friend and cousin check what I am doing.

I dont want to be in jail at home. I wish I was also going for the vacation. Other maams is taking their maid. To london. or Jordan. One of my friends is even going to america. Even Muscat is better than staying in jail. So many maids are going. I feel like only I have to stay here alone in this house. I feel little bit depress by myself. And now I cannot even go out because I have to wait for these cousin and friend and aunty and uncle. I want to pack my bag and go home I am so depress.

I phone my mama. She say Sally why you so depress. When your maam go you will have no work. It will be a vacation for you. But if you go with your maam then you will have no vacation. You will have no break. You will be doing cooking and cleaning on your vacation. Better you stay in maams house and do vacation. My mother is right. Maam will go for her break. I will have my break. I just hope I dont break my head waiting for the cousin and the aunty and the friend to come to check what I am doing.

Then I think that it better I break my head waiting but I not break maams trust of me again. So I just have to wait in my jail till they come. If they come.

limit

Yesterday maam is saying Sally my backache is hurting very bad. I tell her maam I do little bit massage? She say no Sally I cannot make you do that. I say maam I always have to do that for my Oman maam. Back press. Leg massage. So many times after my Oman maam go shopping I have to do massage for her. Sometime I even do her nail polish.

One time my Oman maam not get time to go to beauty salon so I do her hair dye also but she not like it and she get angry with me. What I can do? She give me hair dye box and I put in her hair. I cannot help if her hair is bad. Maam is laughing. She say Sally dont worry I not shout at you for bad hair dye because I not make you do my hair dye. Or my nails. Or massage. It not your job. I know when to stop Sally.I know my limit.

I think Maam knows her limit because she has no limit. I explain. One time I am seeing the bill for her spa massage. She is throwing bill in garbage. It is 550 dirham. I can not forget that number. Little more than 550 is like almost my half month salary. She is spending that in one hour. She is throwing bill in garbage but for me it is like she is throwing 550 dirham in garbage. I wish I can do her massage and she give me that money. Maam say she not make me do massage because she knows her limit. But if maam did not have extra 550 dirham you think she would go to spa for massage? No no no. I would be doing her massage at home. For free. I know that. She stops at her limit because she has no limit. for spending money. 

Maam go to spa for massage and salon for haircut. Other time the beauty girl is coming home. Maryam. Every 3 or 4 week Maryam comes to the house to do wax. of maam legs and hands and face. I think this beauty job is good job. Not much work like house maid work. And the name of job is also better than maid. She is called home beauty expert. That sounds so much better than house maid.

But Maryam tell me that it is too tiring work. She have so many client in one day. She say she is all round beauty expert. means she do everything. Whatever client is wanting. She have certificate for waxing nail hair henna massage everything. She like nail work because it is easy. but waxing and massage is more tiring. But all that is ok she say. Maryam really not like when client want to do wax of private. I ask Maryam how she not feel shy to do that work. Maryam say Sally if my client want wax of private then I have to do wax of private. It is my job I have no choice. I need to earn money.

Maryam is correct. she have to do it even if she does not like it. Because she wants to keep her job. See how life is? For both Maryam and maam their limit is decided by money. But maam stops at her limit because she has no limit for money. And Maryam has to cross her limit because she has the limit of losing her job and her money.

It is simple. Life has lot of limits. And lot of times money decides what your limit in life will be. 

ice water

Few days back maam is taking children for swimming. After 10 min they all coming back. Maam saying Sally the water is too hot. I tell her maam it is so hot outside so of course the water will be hot. Maam get little bit irritate with me like I am not knowing anything. She say the pool is suppose to have chiller. Chiller is not work. Sally if I put children in that hot water they can be sick. 

Then she tell me this story of this swimmer who is dying in the hot water few years back. Here in UAE. I cannot believe her. She say Sally I read it in the paper. He came for some long race and he is get dehydrate or something and he die. Then she say children not do long race in pool but Sally I am too scare after I read that story. Water must be chill or children not do swimming.

Now maam is having nothing for children to do. Children take out their swimming clothes. Rayan start crying. He say I want to swim. Then Sara is starting. She like to argue too much with maam about everything. She want to be lawyer when she is big. She say who cares if water is hot. we are also hot we want to swim. Why cant we swim? Tanya is swimming. Alex also is in the pool. It is not too hot for them to swim. They are ok in the pool so we will be ok in pool. You never let us do anything fun. Why cant we swim?

Maam say Sara I am getting a headache with all this noise. Go to your room and cool down. Sara say if I was in the pool I would be cool down. Then Sara is going to her room and banging the door. Maam is now getting angry. She say Sara if you bang door again I will remove the full door. Then we see how you bang the door. Rayan is crying more because everyone is upset. Everyone is in bad mood because the chiller not working. Everyones temper is become too hot like the pool. 

Maam tell me Sally make me some ice tea. And give me two panadol for my headache. I think ice tea is good idea. If she cool down then maybe she not need the panadol for her headache. I put lot of ice in the tea so it is chill. So she can cool down.

Now I wish I am able to put lot of ice in that swimming pool. So the water is chill. So children can swim. So everyone in this house can cool down. 

God knows

You remember my friend Maria? She is the one who is all the time thinking about money. We are all thinking lot about money but she is thinking too much. She is always telling me to do part time work in the afternoon when maam is going to school to get children. But today when I tell you how she is make 5000 dirham you will be so shock. I am also shock I am not wanting to write this story. It is like how you say a scandal.

She tell me that her maam is give her this money to convert her religion. So now she is different religion. I am not writing name of any religion because I am not saying anything bad about any religion. All religion is good. I am only talking about Maria and how bad she is thinking. 

When Maria tell me she is changing religion I am shock. I think how you can just change like that? I tell her Maria how you can do this? What your mother and father will say? What she is saying is make me even more shock. She say Sally no one need to know anything. My mother and father not know anything because when I go back to home country I will do my family religion again. I will not keep this new religion but I will still have the 5000 dirham. 

I tell her Maria you have gone mad about money. You think no one know anything but God knows. You cannot sell your religion for money. Religion is not like clothes or shoes that you can keep on changing. If you are converting then you are having to stay in new religion.

She say Sally do not do lecture to me. I do this because I need the money. when I go back to my home country I can do whatever religion I want. It not your business Sally so do not judge me.

I tell her Maria I not judge you. But you will be judged And 5000 dirham or even one million dirham will not help you then. so you better start praying. Because God knows what you are doing. 

Maria say she is never going to talk to me again. Never ever. God knows if she will keep this promise. or if she will change her mind. like she is changing her religion.

sand

Few days back I am going to Spinneys with maam. I am seeing this man. He is worker on the road. He is wearing orange uniform. I call him orange man. He is working in so hot weather I feel so sad for him. Even maam is saying this poor man how can he work like this. When I tell you what work he is doing you will think that he is gone mad. But he is not mad. The person who is giving him this work is mad.

His work is this. He has a small brush broom. He is doing sweeping of the road. Of the sand on the road. If you are not living in Dubai you do not understand why this is so mad. This is so mad because Dubai is sand. Everywhere you are looking there is sand. If you sweep it there is more sand. How can this man sweep the road? It is not possible. Even if you have very big vacum you are not able to remove all this sand in Dubai.

I am full time thinking of this orange man and the sand. He is not mad. but he will become mad if he have to do this job in this hot weather.

This orange man is reminding me of a something. In Dubai you can buy this sand bottle. I have put a picture on my facebook page if you want to see what it looks like. It is a bottle with sand design in it. Different colour sand to make all design. Like design of camel. Design of desert. design of Dubai. They can even write your name in the sand. It is so pretty. But when I look at this sand camel inside this bottle it is like the camel is trap. inside the bottle. Like it can never escape.

The orange man is also trap. He cannot break contract because he will go to jail. He is trap inside his contract like the camel is trap inside the bottle. He is not able to stop sweeping the sand even if he knows he can never make the road clean.

The only way for the camel to come out of the bottle is to break the bottle. But when the bottle is broken the camel and the sand will be all mixed up. The beautiful design in the bottle will be a big mess of sand.

That is why the orange man has no choice. He has to keep sweeping the sand on the road. Even though he can never make it clean. He cannot break the bottle. He has to remain trap inside this bottle. So the design of his life is not mess up.

Mothers Day

Last week it was mothers day. Rayan and Sara wake up early and make breakfast for maam. I help them. They make toast and cheese. Maam is so happy. She say best breakfast ever. They make cards for maam. Maam say best card ever. They buy flowers for maam. Maam say best flowers ever. In the night maam say Sara and Rayan that was the best mothers day ever. Last year she say the same thing. Everyone is happy. 

Even I am mother. No one is wish me for mothers day. I am looking after Sara and Rayan. but I am not their mother. No one is even remembering that I am also a mother. because my child is so far from me. No one buy me flowers or make for me breakfast. No one make for me a card. It is not best mothers day ever for me.

Last month I am reading in paper that there is this lady in Sharjah who is throwing her baby in the garbage chute. Because she is not married. Same story we are reading so many times. Because if you are having baby here without being marry you are going to jail. And deport. The baby is living thanks to God. This lady is become a mother now because she has a baby. But she is a bad mother. Actually I think she is not a mother. Because a mother will not throw away her baby.

I am not a bad mother. I am leaving my child far away. But I am not like this Sharjah lady. I am not throwing my child. I am leaving him with his father. Because I have to work. So I can look after my child. But even if I am far away from him I will always be his mother. Even if I am not there when he sleeps I can help him have his dreams.

Maam say it is the best mothers day ever. It is not best mothers day ever for me. For me the best mothers day ever was the day I become a mother. Happy Mothers day to all mothers in the world.

super moon

On Saturday in the sky the moon is so big. Maam is explain me that it is super moon. full moon that is very near the earth. It is looking like a big yellow ball.

Super moon is making me think of this story. Few week back in paper I am reading that there is this man. in Ajman. It is also in UAE. He is so old maybe 65 or 70. He is having 14 or 15 wife. But because only 4 wife is legal he say the other wifes is retire. Really. He say that in paper. Retire.

In paper they write that he is doing honeymoon with his youngest wife. She is 19 year old. And he is doing sex with her 6 times in a day. 6 times. So he can have many children. He is wanting to have 100 children. He is already having 93  children. In the paper they call him super daad. Like super dad but his name is Daad. So super daad. He is not even remembering the name of all his children.  I am thinking that superdaad is the one who need to retire. Not his wifes.

This super moon on Saturday make me think of super daad. On his honeymoon. 6 times in a day. 6 times. Super Daad. Super moon. Super honeymoon.

wasta

Some time back I am reading in paper that there is this man. He is with a filipina girl in lift and he try to rape her. The girl is screaming loudly. He is caught because of camera in lift. I hope that man will go to jail. because there is proof. But over here that is not always what is happening. Even with proof sometime the guilty person is free.

Like this story I am reading in paper last month. There is this maid. She is complaining that her boss is rape her. In the court they are finding that boss is innocent. They give two reason. They say wife is more beautiful than maid. so that is why the boss will have no reason to rape the maid. What stupid reason is this? Then they say maid is so much smaller than boss so thats why it not possible for boss to rape her. Another stupid reason. Two stupid reason they give and the boss is free. In newspaper they write that there is even proof on the underwear of the maid. Still the boss is innocent. So proof is not always meaning anything.

Lilibeth tell me that it is all wasta. If you do not know what wasta is meaning I tell you. It mean that if you are having a friend who is an important person then you having wasta. Because you are able to use your friendship with this important person to get your work done. Maid like me have zero wasta. Because we not knowing anyone important.

Now I remember this other story I am reading in paper. This filipina maid is bringing her friend to Dubai and making her into prostitute. How you can do like this to your friend I am not understanding. She is getting caught. She is using her friendship to get her work done. She is using her friendship to do bad thing. She is using her friendship to make her friend into prostitute. It is good she has no wasta. She will go to jail.

I am thinking using your friendship to do bad thing is not wasta. It is waste. Of a good friend.

greedy pig

Every day before children go to school I make their lunch box. Sandwich. chips. Water. Juice. Yogurt. Fruit. Today Rayan bring back his full lunch box. Maam getting upset. She say Rayan why you not eat anything? Then she tell me Sally what you give him? that he is not eating? I tell her maam I give him chicken sandwich. he always eating chicken sandwich when I give him. so maybe he not eat because he is not hungry today. 

Maam say he is not eating anything for full day how he can not be hungry? give him some food now. I give Rayan some snack and he eat so quick. Like he never see food before.  Maam say look Sally how he is eating. See how hungry he is. I look at Rayan. He is eating like a greedy pig. Maam say Rayan slow down you are eating so fast. you will do vomit then you will have nothing in your stomach again.

I am now thinking of this story I read in paper. There is this man who is stealing full lunch box. Because he has no money to buy food. This man is having to steal lunchbox because he is so very hungry. When you are so very hungry you have to eat. Because you have to fill your stomach. Even if you have to steal food. Even if you have to eat old expire food. 

Like how I read in gulf news that some pinoy grocery store workers are eating expire food from grocery store. so they not have to spend too much salary on buying food. so they can send more money home. This is the sad story what people do when they are hungry and have no money. but they have to fill their stomach.

Now I remember this other story I am reading in paper. Another story about lunch box. But little bit different. There is this filipino man who is using his lunch box to steal gold. He is taking little bit gold from his work place and putting it in his lunch box. When the police is catching him they are finding 30 kilo of gold. Imagine. How much he is stealing. In his lunch. He go to jail. He is not hungry man. He is greedy man. That is why he now have nothing but jail in his life.

Maam is telling Rayan this story one time. about this king. He is so greedy he is wishing that every thing he touch become gold. His table become gold. His chair become gold. Even his potty become gold. He is so happy because he thinks he is the richest man in the world. Then he hugs his daughter and she becomes gold. He realise that he is so rich but he is actually poor. Because even if he has so much gold he has nothing if he has no daughter. He has nothing because he is greedy. 

Hungry is when you have to eat to fill your stomach. Greedy is when you want more more more. It is better to eat to fill your stomach but not be greedy pig. Because the stomach of the greedy pig will be full but his life will be empty.

treasure hunt

Two week back it was easter. Maam is waking up early. She has plastic eggs. Inside each egg she is putting one paper with some clue. Like a treasure hunt. I remember she do this last year also. She is putting eggs in whole house. She put one egg inside fridge. One inside oven. Like that. Maybe 30 eggs. She tell me remember Sally like last year you no tell children that I am hiding this egg. And you dont move any of these eggs. 

When Rayan wake up he seeing one egg outside his room. He is so excited. He say easter bunny is coming easter bunny is coming. He going to wake up his sister. Sara is saying Rayan we have to find all the eggs.  Sara is knowing that the bunny is maam but she not say anything to Rayan.

Then children are looking for egg. They find egg. open egg. read clue which tell them where to find next egg. Open next egg find clue then next egg. Like that. They are so happy when they find the egg. Up stairs. Down stairs. In kitchen. In bathroom. In garage. In backyard. Egg is coming out of everything.

They find last egg. Then they find the prize. Books and games. Children already have so many books and games. but they are still so excited. Because the easter bunny is bringing it. Because they have to do treasure hunt to find it. Same thing if maam just giving them maybe they are not so excited? But now it is like this precious treasure that they are finding. Rayan say look sally look sally what the easter bunny is bring for me. 

I am never hearing of this easter bunny and egg before I come to maam house. I have no special memory of this day from my childhood day. I only know easter is religious day. No bunny. no eggs. no gift. no books. no games. no precious treasure.

Then I am thinking this. For the children the books and games is not really the precious treasure. The real treasure is these special memories. of plastic easter eggs and the easter bunny. Memories of finding plastic eggs in the fridge and bathroom. with clue in the egg. Memories of their childhood. There is no price for this treasure.

dry clean

Maam not like water on floor of bathroom. If even little water is left on floor she tell me Sally why this water? I not like this wet wet bathroom. But it is a bathroom. It have to be wet. She too much particular about water near the potty. or on potty seat. She go mad if I not wipe it dry after I clean the bathroom.

And you know they have that spray pipe near the potty. For cleaning. after doing potty. Always little water is leak from it. Maam say Sally I not like this water I tell you I want dry bathroom. I tell her I am drying it but the spray is leaking. She say Sally no make excuse just dry the bathroom.

But she call repair man to fix this spray. Repair man do something and it work for few days. Then again it start leaking. Again bathroom is wet. Again maam get upset. Again she tell me to dry it. Again I tell her I already do drying but spray is leak. Again she call repair man

One time repair man is coming and he removing full spray. All water is coming out of the wall. He is trying to stop water with his hand he is so stupid. It is good I am there. I am quicky putting main water off. But lot of water is coming out of bathroom and in the room also. It is good maam is not home. I have to do so much mopping. But I make it dry before Maam come home. When she go in room she say why everything is smelling of wet cloth. I dont know how she can smell it.

Remember I tell you how one time when water delivery man come to house and put his finger in water bottle for opening it? Maam get angry and say his hand is dirty why he open water bottle like that. She tell me only I can open water bottle. after I wash my hand or with spoon or something. So now water man is just leave that big water bottle and go. He does not open it and he does not help me put it on dispenser.

So I have to pick up the big bottle of water and put it on dispenser. It is so heavy sometime lot of water fall out. I quickly do mopping because Maam not like if kitchen floor is wet. She say Sally what is this water on the floor. Mop it up Sally I not like this wet wet floor. it is so messy. clean it and make it dry. Dry dry dry. but clean clean clean. I sometime go mad with maam.

Maam does not like wet floor. She does not like wet bathroom. She does not like dry floor that smell of wet cloth. But she want everything to be clean. Dry clean.

happy to be me

Last night I am having a dream. That I am maam. And maam is me. It is not the first time I am having this dream. Sometimes even when I am awake I am having this dream. In my dream I am living in maams house in her room. Maam is living in my room. She is doing all work and I am going for shopping and to gym. I am driving the car and she is washing the car. When I wake up it is all gone. I see that I am sleeping in my small room again. I feel little bit jealous. 

Jealous because she has so many nice things. because her life is easy. because her only difficult time is when sir is travel and she feel alone. But me I am alone all the time. My life is not so easy. I have too many worry in my life. So it normal that I feel little bit jealous. little bit sad. that my life is not so easy.

But I also feel little bit proud. Because in my small life I have done so much more than her. I tell you what I mean. Full time maam depend on sir. I am not depending on any man for doing any thing for me. I am leaving my house at young age and become independent. I am supporting my full family. Maam is going to college and get so many degree. but she just spend her full day doing shopping and gym. And talking on phone. I not finish my education but I am making people think. of their life. with my blog. 

That is why I want to be happy. to be me. But it is so hard. Because everyone is able to see the nice things maam has got. But no one is able to see why I feel proud.

cockroach

Two or three week back maam is opening dishwasher and she is seeing cockroach. not one. Three or four. She is screaming. She say Sally why this cockroach in my dishwasher. It not so big cockroach but she is shouting. take it out. take it out. I take out the cockroach and put cockroach spray and it die.

Then maam is saying Sally put dishwasher on without anything inside it. We have to clean everything. After dishwasher do full cycle maam say Sally open again. We open again. Again there is 2 cockroach. Now maam is angry with me. She say Sally why you not keep it clean?

How to keep dishwasher clean? It keep itself clean. Maam sometime talk nonsense. But I tell her maam it better you call pest control. Maam is calling sir. She tell him that dishwasher is full of cockroach. That is not true. There is 5 or 6 cockroach. Not full of cockroach. Sir also tell maam to call pest control.

Then the pest control man is coming. He say he have to pull full dishwasher out. When he do that there is so many cockroach behind dishwasher. I think maam is going to faint. He say it is coming in from pipe. Then he go outside. I also go outside. He open the gutter. It is good maam not see that. Because gutter is totally full. of cockroach. He quickly close it but already so many cockroach run outside. I am running behind cockroach with cockroach spray. The man is laughing. He say that spray not do anything. that only solution is that he have to put acid inside gutter.

I tell maam. Maam tell sir. Sir say ok put acid in gutter. Maam is now saying I hate this place. nothing work properly here. Then she say Sally make sure he remove all cockroach I am going to my room. I not able to see this. Man put acid in gutter. Then he close gutter. After some time when he open it all the cockroach is dead.

Next day the man come back. He do full pest control. We have to go out of house. When we come home after 4 hour the full house is smell of pest control. All the cockroach behind dishwasher is dead. All the cockroach in gutter is also dead. I feel the smell will make me also dead. But maam is not worry about the smell. She is happy the cockroach is gone.

After the man finish his pest control maam get obsess with cleaning the dishwasher. She make me put bleach inside dishwasher. We do dishwasher 3 or 4 time. Empty. Still maam is not happy. She tell Sir she want new dishwasher. She say Sally I wish we can get new dishwasher. This one is make me feel sick. I tell her maam you not feel sick. I clean all dishes by my hand for some day.

So that is how this cockroach is giving me more work. Two or three weeks is pass like this. I am still waiting for maam to say Sally it ok to use the dishwasher again. But she is not saying it. Because she get a new dishwasher. Me. 

clean clean clean

Past few weeks everything is become so dusty. Today maam is tell me Sally why all the fan is so dirty? why you not clean them so many days? you climb on ladder and clean all fan. So full morning I am taking ladder in all room and cleaning fan. Then maam say Sally why you not clean light and air con also when you take ladder. Why she not tell me when I am on ladder to clean light and air con? This double cleaning of maam is spoil all my evening fun. I am not able to go to park to meet my friends today.

You know how maam want everything so clean. I sometimes go mad with her clean clean clean all the time. Remember when she tell me to clean garbage bin? Who cleans a garbage bin? Only me for my maam.

When children come home from school she not let them touch anything. Go wash hand she say. Then she tell me Sally school is full of germ. Children must wash hand when they come home. When they go for swim she not let them splash in baby pool because she say baby do pee pee in baby pool. So children is not able to have fun in baby pool.

Few month back Sara is going from school for camping. She is so excited. She take sleeping bag and backpack. When she come back home her whole bag is so dirty. and smelly. Even Sara all dirty and smelly. But Sara not care. She say to maam I have best time in my whole life. Camp was so much fun. Maam not listen anything. She tell her Sara get in bath right now. Poor Sara is so excited to tell maam about her camp but maam only worry that everything be clean. even Sara.

One time we go to mall. We are eating chicken. Maam is shouting at man who is serving because he not wearing glove. She say what is this? you not wearing glove and you are touching my food? She say to call the manager. The man say I am manager. company is not making us wear glove for giving chicken. Maam tell him I write to your company. this is not good. I dont know if she write to company but I not like her company that day. She is in so much bad mood after that.

One time the water man is coming with big bottle of drinking water. To open this bottle we have to push the cover inside the bottle. The water man is pushing it open with his finger. Maam get so angry. She say why you open it? you not wash your hand? Your finger is going inside the bottle. How I know what you are doing with your hand before you touch the water bottle. She make him take that bottle and bring new bottle. Then she say Sally do not let him do this again.

Everywhere in house she have big bottle of hand sanitiser. And in car also. One time Rayan start crying because his hand is burning when he use sanitiser because he have cut. Sara is laughing when Rayan start crying. She say that he is baby. Rayan cry more. Then maam say Rayan if you wash hand with soap and water then you not have to use this. She say Sara if you tease your brother I ground you. But Sara keep teasing Rayan. Because she not want to stop having fun.

Sara and Rayan not care about clean or dirty. They just want to have fun. I wish maam also not care so much about clean clean clean.  Because then I will get more time. To have my own fun.

closet story

Few week back I am reading in the paper that this sir is finding the maid is doing affair with driver. How he find it out is so funny. He find the driver hiding inside the closet in maid room in the middle of the night. Imagine. I not know who is more shock. The sir or the driver or the maid.

Yesterday I am reading another story in paper. There is this maam. She is thinking that her housemaid is a man. Because the maam is finding only mans underwears in the maids bag. No girls underwears. I am thinking maybe this maid like to wear mans underwear? Maybe the maam is right that the maid is a man but finding mans underwear is not proof.

There is only one way to prove if this underwear maid is man or girl. Not by seeing her underwear. but by seeing what is under the underwear. But there is a problem. This underwear maid is already deport. So now only the underwear maid knows if she is a man.

Full day yesterday I am thinking of this underwear maid. Maybe she like to wear mans clothes. Sometime girls like to dress like man. Sometime man like to dress like girl. I know one boy like that in Philippine. Ben. He is a gay. sometime he like to dress like girl. It is not a bad thing. He is just different than me. but he is not doing anything wrong. 

In Dubai if you are a gay you can go to jail. Some month ago I tell maam about my friend Ben. Maam tell me it better he not come to Dubai. Or if he come to Dubai he better stay inside the closet. I ask her what she mean. She explain me that when a gay is tell the world that he is gay it is called come out of closet. 

These two newspaper story make me think of this sentence of maam. To come out of the closet. I think that next time the driver better stay out of the maids closet. And next time the underwear maid better lock her underwear inside the closet. 

one more day

There are so many days when I feel like I have so much work. like my work is not get over. I feel like if I have maybe 1 or 2 more hours I can do so many more things. Even if I finish my work maybe I can do my blog. Or I can go to park. Sometimes I wish I have extra hours in my day.

Today I am getting a full day of extra hours. Because today is Feb 29. It is like this extra day. One more day between feb and march. 

When I am getting up in the morning it is so foggy outside. Sir is telling maam drive carefully in fog. He say there are mad men on the road in Dubai. who drive fast even when there is fog. Maam say to sir why you not drop children to school today? She say I feeling nervous to drive in this weather. Maam no liking to drive. She take any excuse to make sir drive. Sir also feel worry when maam drive. So today he take children to school.

When they leave the house maam is going driving. in fog. to gym. She say Sally when children are in car I feel nervous. But if I go by myself then it ok. I have little bit extra time today. If I go early maybe the machine in gym is not so busy. 

Every one like extra time. Maam like extra time at gym. I like extra day like today. My one extra day is nearly over. I still have not finish all the thing I want to do. Now I have to wait four more years for this extra day.

Or I can thank God that I am having an extra day. Every day.

tree in the storm

Two days back there is a big storm in Dubai. So much sand. So much wind. I think that the trees outside our house is going to fall down. The trees are moving with the wind. Bending so much. I hope it not fall down on top of the house. The storm is going away. But this bending tree is make me remember a story my grandmother tell me when I am small. I tell you.

There is a very big mango tree. It is very strong. And there is a lampakanai. It is like a very long grass that grow near the water. In my home country we make basket from this grass. And sometimes even we make chair from this grass.

In the story the mango tree is boasting too much. It is so proud. It say I am so strong. I am so tall. Everyone is loving my tasty fruit. Nothing is able to break me. The lampakanai say I am also strong. I am also useful. People use me to make baskets.  The mango tree is laughing at the lampakanai. One day there is a big storm. Lot of wind is coming. The mango tree is falling down. The lampakanai is bending with the wind. The wind is blowing more hard. The lampakanai is bending more. But it is not breaking. After the storm the strong mango tree is dead. the weak lampakanai is alive. 

When she tell me this story I am thinking why she tell me this story? I am so young. not mature like today. I am not understanding the story. I tell my grandmother I want to be the mango tree. I want to be strong and proud. not weak and bending. I want to be the mango. not the empty lampakanai basket. Because the mango is so tasty. and the basket has nothing inside it.  My grandmother say Sally the empty basket is better than the tasty mango. Because it can carry the weight of many mango. But I still do not understand.

Now I remember what she say. And I understand. that she want me to bend in the storm. That there are so many different storms that will come in my life. That it is easy to be strong and proud like the mango tree with so tasty fruit. But no fruit will grow if the mango tree is dead.

It is better to be the lampakanai. Because I will not break with the wind. Because I can fill the empty basket with so many things. with stories. of my life. But I cannot do that if I cannot stand in a storm. I have to bend with the wind.

love bird

Today is valentines day. I am alone. again. But it is ok. I know there is someone for me. like my friend  Alma. She and her boyfriend are like two love bird. Full time they are texting on phone. Sometime on my Friday holiday I meet them. Full time they are having so much love. They will get marry when they go back to Philippines.

I am thinking today of all the love bird like Alma and her boyfriend. And I wish them all happy valentines day. Rayan is come and tell me Sally you be my valentine today. He give me a chocolate. He is surprise me. I tell him sure Rayan I be your valentine. I try to give him hug but he run away. He is shy.

When Rayan come to me I am thinking of Alma and love and love bird. Then suddenly my mind is get distract. Sometimes my mind is like that. I think of one thing and then I think of something completely different. My mind goes to that game Rayan plays. Angry bird. Opposite of love bird. So funny the game is. And so funny Rayan is. He get so involved in this game. If he is not able to win the game he gets so angry. It is like Rayan has become the angry bird.

Few days back in paper I am reading that now in ski dubai they have got penguins. Really. Imagine in ski dubai there is all fake snow. machine snow. not snow that fall from sky. not natural snow. and this penguin has to live here. I feel sorry for the penguins. They are so far away from their home in this fake snow place. I know how that feeling is. I hope these penguins do not feel homesick like me. I hope we do not become angry birds.

Because I only want to be a love bird. Happy Valentines day

water

Few week back I am reading in paper that water is less in uae. I am not knowing this before. I think that because of the sea there is lot of water. But paper is saying that one day water get over. or more costly. I get very worry. Full time I am thinking of this. If there no water what we will drink? How we will do washing? How I will clean car? How we will give water to garden? I show maam the paper. I tell her maam now I not wash car every day. I only do it one time in week. So I can save water. Maam say by the time this happens Sally you and I both will have left Dubai. She say Sally you do your work I will worry about the water.

But I know she not worry about water. Maam is buying water to drink. If water get over she will just buy more bottle. If it cost more she will just pay more. Every week the water man is coming with big bottles of water. He take old bottles and give new one. In this house everyone is drinking water from this big bottle. Even me. When it is hot in Dubai I fill big jug with this water and put in fridge. I use this water for making ice also.

You remember my friend Roslie? She is the one who work next door for part time work. She tell me that her one maam not let her drink this bottle water. Her maam tell her Roslie you no drink this water you drink from tap. One time Roslie tell me she take water from fridge because it so hot outside she want cold water. Her maam get angry. She say Roslie you not ask me? how you take my water from my fridge?

Roslie so angry. I tell her Roslie I have solution for you. Next time you fill your own tap water and put in fridge. Then your maam not able to say anything. Then your maam no get angry with you for drinking her water. Roslie so upset with her maam she say next time I fill water for her I spit in it.

When Roslie say this she is angry like a snake. Ulupong. cobra snake. Very dangerous snake in Philippines. It has so much poison in its spit. Roslie is like this snake who want to put her poison spit in her maams water. Her mind is having poison thought for her maam. I understand why she angry. But I tell her Roslie it no use you think like this. It bad for your mind only. Nothing will change for your maam but your mind will go mad. Better you clean your mind of this poison thinking. Roslie laugh and say Sally should I clean my mind with tap water or maams bottle water?

My maam not worry that water get over or cost more. Because she will buy more water or pay more money. And anyway like maam say when the water get over we will all be back in our home country. So I am thinking no more worry for me for water. I will wash the car every day. And wash this worry from my mind. I hope Roslie also wash her mind of her poison thinking.