Dec 28, 2010

Newspaper

I like reading newspaper. Today there is picture of cat in paper. I telling my maam see this cat it is so lucky. Its picture in paper. Even camel picture in paper. But you and me our picture not in paper. My maam she tell me Sally it good our picture not in paper. It better we staying below radio. What this mean I not know. Below radio I am asking maam what that mean. She saying not radio rada. I still not understand. I only knowing radio in car how you can going below that.

My friend Maria she is selling her computer. Small computer for 1100 dirham. This friend she not making much salary but she be buying new mobile and computer. Now she having no money so she trying to sell. I am telling my maam that I be wanting computer. My maam she saying what will you do with computer. She not know that I am writing every time I am getting chance. I am even having facebook but maam not knowing. Now I haveing mobile phone new samsung one I am seeing my facebook on phone. Maam she not knowing I know how get on her waifai. I be asking little boy for password one day he be telling me. So easy it to get information from child. I telling him I know you not knowing password. He telling me no Sally I be know. It is this. I not write here because then my maam if she ever finding out I is dead.

Maam she thinking I not know anything of computer. She be think I is a fool. I get so angry when she be telling me what you do with computer. She not having any idea how my life is. They go out all time all different place I have to stay home. They not beat me or any of mean thing but this very mean that I have to stay home and do no work. Sometime I watching Tv. Sometime I opening maam closet and look at her thing. I using her makeup also and nail polish. One day maam say she be coming afternoon she coming back morning. I thinking I is dead that day I in her bedroom looking looking in sir closet seeing if anything I can use. She coming in saying Sally why sir closet open. I saying no maam you leaving open I was just close it. Maam look at me say thank you sally. She not remember anything so I can say anything.

Like that day Sara have very nice ice box for school lunch box. I be think my brother sister liking very much so I take and I telling maam Sara leave at school. Maam say ok no worry we put other one. Then Sara saying no it not in my lunch box. This Sara very silly girl how she say that so I get angry and saying you leave at school you not remember. Then maam say Sara never leaving anything at school maybe I leaving it at school picnic. She how she is protect her child. I know she be lying because I take icebox but I cannot tell her. Just like in newspaper they finding out who lying who not lying I feeling like newspaper.



I am adding to say that I be return icebox after I am getting advice from some person who be reading my story. I feeling so gilty that I is becoming bad person. Now my conscinch is good.

Dec 27, 2010

Project

Some month ago my maam be giving me project to do. Actually she is suppose to be doing it but she not have time so she telling me Sally you please be cutting and doing this thing for children school. Not for children to be giving grade but for something like halloween party in school. I not mind I like doing project like this. It keeping me busy. In this house not much TV we seeing when they is at home. Maam not watch at all children also hardly any TV. Only time I seeing maam watching TV is when that miner coming out of hole and maam switching on news to see and she showing me also.

At my before sir house the maam over there she giving me lot of children project. I having to draw lot of things for children and children saying they do the drawing. I am good at draw so one time children is winning a prize and his picture coming in paper. He so excite his picture coming but no one say Sally you are the winner because you do the picture. I feeling in my heart but I is only the housemaid how I can say anything.

When maam is be going out of country one time I taking old sheet and I making curtain and mat for floor. Then I telling maam that I will make curtain even for kitchen. They having wooden curtain all broken in kitchen but maam say Sally no remove wooden curtain it not belong us it belong landlord. Maam then she saying I have cloth and machine I be stiching curtain. but I waiting many month no curtain coming. Why maam she be lying to me. I know she busy but I be making nice curtain if she telling me even if I am busy.

Maam very lazy sometime she saying she doing something taking so long after that. Like when I be getting my new phone I telling her to sending me music with blutooth. But maam she not liking connect her computer to my phone she worry I steal her thing. So she telling me she get me adaptr for my phone sd card to be putting in her computer. Then she not giving me music so many day. I be telling her maam I liking this song but she no takeing hint. One time I even telling Sara I liking Bruno Mars song. You know he half filipino he writing song about bilinare. Filipino people always thinking money money money. But maam she not giving me the song only. I thinking today she will give me then I going bed and still there is no song. If she having to do project for school she make me do it and I finish it in one day. Why she cannot do my project of curtain or songs and finish in one day?

Dec 23, 2010

Junk

Last week my maam she be telling me I needing ID card. I telling her I having labor card already why I be needing ID card? She say everyone needing even children. I asking Lilibeth she know everything. She say Sally everyone needing ID card why your maam be waiting so long to get card? I saying I not knowing maam she sometime doing thing last minute. So my maam she be going morning 6 oclok to be making the card with sir. But then she coming back saying they no taking for typing. 

So now my maam coming back home bad mood. Then she opening outside store room to be taking out Sara bike. Then she seeing I be keeping some things in outside store room. One month back my friend Ellie be giving me some toys that her maam not use. She say Sally you keep this for me my maam not wanting me keep it in my room. I telling maam Ellie tell me to keep it till March. My maam she be getting angry saying Sally I am throwing all my junk out there is too much junk you cannot bring other housemaid junk to my house. I feeling bad why she calling it junk junk. It not junk. 

But I taking out all my thing from store room keeping on outside. Maam then teling me why you keep outside your thing I not tell you to remove your thing only your friend Ellie's things. I tell her I want to send my thing with Precious Cargo to my home in Philippine. My maam saying then you better getting box and sending it because you cannot keep it all here there no place. I thinking How there no place it big store room? Then maam saying if you keeping like this all rat and all will come and it getting bad. Now I have to call taxi and take to my cuzzin Luena home in Sharja so it not here. Maam she so mean she having so much store space me having nothing. But I give Ellie back her things because maam is right. Why I keep her thing in my maam store room? Maam never telling me to take my own bags out of storeroom but I be taking it out now just showing maam I not keep any junk.

Maam she keeping lot of junk in her room. Lot of thing under bed also. but me she not allow to keep anything. She having so many room but I have small room as big as her bathroom. Still she not let me keep junk outside home. I feeling angry. Then I remembering it Christmas in two day. If I be angry with maam maybe she not give me my gift. I have to how you say swallowing anger keep inside of my heart. That I do and maam next day she tell me Sally why you feeling sad when I just telling you keep thing nicely not like junk. How I know she say that. I thinking she say throw everything out. Maam getting me big box and I putting all junk inside box. Then maam tell me when you can go to Sharja you take box and leave at cuzzin but no need to be leaving it outside. If it rain all thing get spoil. I be thinking yesterday you calling it junk today you thinking it get spoiling. How it can get spoil if it already junk?

Maam give me picture frame for christmas. First I think what is this picture frame with wire coming out from side? Then she say Sally bring your camera and she put my camera stick inside the frame and all my pictures I can see on picture frame. I very happy no need to devlop picture now.  I so very happy I phoning my friend Susan. My friend she tell me her maam give her laptop computer. Now my frame look so small I not happy any more. I telling maam that my friend Susan getting laptop for her christmas gift. Maam knowing I not grateful for frame she telling me Sally how long Susan be working for her maam? I telling her 5 year. So maam saying Sally you work here only 5 month she working 5 year. That why her maam give her laptop. I understand but I not like my Christmas gift no more. It feeling like junk now.

Oct 25, 2010

Mobile phone

I am wanting new phone. Today I see in paper that gitex is going on all mobile phones very cheap. I ask my maam if I can go. Maam she tell me Sally I dont know where this is I no can drive you there. Then I am seeing same thing in paper for Jackie store at moe. I am telling maam please you drop me on way to school. Maam she telling me she not going near MOe but she be taking me in two days. Phone is very nice. Very big screen. Also you are getting free dvd player. I am thinking I sending DVD player to Philippine. Maam she telling me Sally you are collecting lot things you better send box soon. She no like I collect thing in my bag. When she give me her old thing she say Sally you can have but I no want to see it. I am not wanting to see it that why I am not keeping it so you can keep it but I no want to see it. So I am keeping it all in my bags. Under bed or in store room outside. But bags is now full so I am thinking I have to find someone to shipping my box. 

My family will be happy if I sending dvd player. My family very poor. We having fridge but the door of fridge falling off so I have to hold with my knee when I am taking out food. Sometime I waiting for text from family but they not text me because they can buy one kilo rice in cost of one text. Sometime we not having contact 2 or 3 month. But is good because everytime I calling they asking me for money.

We be going moe and buying my mobile phone. I very happy with it. It LG Cookie phone and I get DVd player also. Maam she telling me Sally you be selling your dvd player to friend for 400 dirham then your phone be cheap. I telling no I sending to home in Davao. Then I be telling maam I want send printer to Philipine. Maam she make fun me she say why you need printer. I tell her bizness with printer very good near school. So maam she saying Sally you be needing computer also how you use the printer with no computer. but maam printer it not connect to computer. It sitting on table maam printing thing from it. I think maam be lying to me because she not want me to progress. Maam she also having other printer in other room never using it. Maybe I think if I telling maam I want buy printer she giving me her printer like she be giving me her old coffee machine and rice cooker.

I coming home very excite and charging my new cookie phone. I am liking that name very much. It is red and black. My maam she giving me advice. She be telling me Sally no buy pink colour phone what if you want to give it to your brother then he not using pink phone. I thinking she right so I buy black and red phone. I coming home putting battery in and making phone charge. Then I get excite and I phone up Lilibeth. She congratlat me to have new phone. Then I wait for full charge but phone not charge. All night I is waitng. In morning I telling my maam. She telling me you make call before full charge now problem. I be telling her I want exchange phone please take me carefour again. Maam she say she busy so I am telling her I am taking car lift and going carefour. But maam tell me not waste my money. But I be already wasting my money on phone that no get charge. She say tell Lilibeth to give you carlift. How she is knowing I be taking carlift sometime from Lilibeth? Lilibeth telling me she going Marina Mall first then to moe. I telling maam I coming only half an hour so I telling Lilibeth to drive fast. But not so fast so my stomic is ok.

Now this time I getting Samsung phone. They giving me sample piece already charged. Maam getting angry she be saying how you take sample did they give you discount. She thinking I crazy. I telling her that phone is for more than 600 dirham I be paying 599 dirham. But my new phone very nice. It pink colour. So what if I cannot give my brother. It be my phone.

Oct 8, 2010

Holiday and nailpolish

Since I have been inside Dubai I have not see the hotel Burjalarab from near. Only see it from far when we going MOE. I want to go see hotel so much. I only want to see from outside to take picture. My maam she going everyday she passing hotel to go school to pick up children. Only one day if she take me then I am taking picture. Maybe I going on my next holiday.

I usually go MOE or Sharja on my off day. Sometime I go Satwa. I go off day Friday. This maam nice she letting me go off day. In Oman it like prison I no go off day even one day. Only time I leaving house is when I putting garbage outside. At before maam in Dubai I not getting off day for 8 month then I asking and she giving me one day off. This maam asking me first day Sally what day you taking off. I telling her Friday but I only want to go one time in month. If I go more then I be spending more money then that not good. So I going one Friday only. My maam nice she letting me chose when I want go. If I want go sometime on Thursday also she let me go. She very easy that way.

On my off day I leaving home very early at 5.30 or 6 in morning come back at 5 in evening. First time I going I asking maam can I go on Thursday night and my maam saying No Sally I dont know where you going I am responsible for you I scare if you go in night. So now I leaving early Friday morning. I going seeing my cuzzin in Sharja. She very nice having own house and family. This week I excite I am taking picture of children showing my cuzzin. My maam I dont think she is liking when I taking picture of children all the time but I taking it anyway.

The car lift boy come pick me up and I leaving from side door. My maam will not give me key when I go on day off. Why I am not knowing. When she is going on vacaton she giving me her key but when I is going on friday for few hours she no give me key. She say Sally I will be home so why you need key. But mostly she not home then I waiting outside. One day maam coming back after 2 hour so I waiting in sun for 2 hour. But good the garage have AC so I waiting in garage so not so much in sun. But I telling maam I wait outside. When I maam phoning saying she 5 minute from home I am quickly putting off AC and waiting outside. Maam coming home and say Sally why you not start AC in garage and wait inside? why you wait in sun? I like that maam feel gilty I wait 2 hour so I not say anything about it. 

When maam go out of town I like because then I have whole house is mine. But maam she lock her room so I cannot use her thing. But I use anyway when she going out so why she is locking when she go out of town I not knowing. Two day back I find nice pink nailpolish. Maam is out so I trying on toe. Maam seeing and saying Sally nice colour. I got so scare I tell her Maam Lilibeth put for me. I think maam is suspect because she then saying Sally very nice colour ask Lilibeth what the number of the colour is. I am now worry because how I ask Lilibeth. If maam asking Lilibeth then I am in lot of trouble. Better I see the number and telling her the number. Maam and Lilibeth can have same colour nail polish no? Maybe she forget

When maam have headache one day I am giving her my panadol. Then maam giving me back 2 panadol I telling her no maam no need you give me back. So what if I take her nailpolish. She taking my thing also like my panadol. Sometime maam saying hurt thing and I feeling hurt like that. One day I throw out some paper. I no mean to throw I just cleaning table. Maam looking looking for the paper then she asking me Sally where is that paper. I tell her I throw it maam. She get very upset she say Sally do not throw anything that was very important paper. How I know it was important. It not say important on top. Just lot of number and lot of maam writing. Now maam telling me Sally not throw anything. I want throw something on maam. I not like when she angry.

Oct 5, 2010

I know I is lucky

I know I is lucky I have good sir and maam. Even in Oman my sir have bad heart but I am lucky I am  able look after myself. My friend Jessie not so lucky. She working in other neighbor house other side of Lilibeth. We meeting at park in evening. She working night day her maam calling her bitch all the time. If she going late home her maam slapping her face. She is not getting salary 6 month. I thinking my sir always give me salary first or second day of month. Jessie telling me in Philippine agency they tricking her telling her she work in hotel then she get this job working at this maam house. Agency taking lot of money from her for this job. Lot of agency if they not good they tricking and then maid is stuck because she signing contrac.

Jessie tell me she want run away but she scare. She give me money buy her mobile from Carrefour so she can phoning family. She not allow have mobile or use even at night when she is sleep. I telling my maam. My maam telling me Sally be careful no get involve. If she run away they blame you your visa get taken. How I no get involve she my friend since pass 1 month. Then my maam telling me Sally if she having trouble tell her go to agency or consulate. But how she go she no have mobile or money. But I telling maam yes yes maam I tell her that only to go to agency or consulate. Then we is meeting her in park to helping her. We thinking this good plan. Lilibeth tell her she be driving her to consulate one day. Lilibeth so clever she driving and all. I think my maam happy if I tell her she going to consulate so I tell her. Maam tell me Sally no get involve be careful you not want to help maid run away.

My other friend is working Sharja. She telling me that son of family is 11 year old and he telling her he give her money to do affair. How 11 year old boy talking like that. I tell her you telling his daddy or no? She say what the daddy will say he also having too much affair all time.

Our sir and maam they thinking we not know what going on in their life but we know all. Like other housemaid at my Oman place she telling me how Baba having affair. We pretending we not know because we scare they canceling our visa but we know everything.

One week ago my maam and sir having dinner party at house. All people coming talking talking. I listen everything. I know who is losing job. I know who is plan on leaving Dubai. I know which child say what in school and get in trouble. But I just listen. You not know when I not so lucky and I need use this to help my situation.

Oct 4, 2010

At home family

I only person in family who go abroad. When I am calling home to talk to my mama my cuzzin they all want job abroad they tell me find them job. I tell them how I go by my own and find agency and make my career. How I leave country by my own like that they can also do. I cannot find employer for them they have to make own way like I do. They wasting my mobile card then I telling them please can you put mama on phone. When my mama coming on phone first thing she say Sally there no rice send money. I tell her mama why you no ask me how I am how my life is going here before you asking me money. Money money all time. 

That why sometime I no phone home many week. I see lot of missed call from Philippine but I no calling back. What the use. When I calling they want money money all time. My mama say send book and shoe for school for sister and brother. I make big box to send to Philippine. Box is taking 3 month reaching Davao. School is starting before box is reaching and my sisters crying because they not have book. My mama phoneing saying Sally where the box. How I know? box is on ship. Then I reading some ship is drown in sea I am praying not ship with my box. 

I am working very hard and sending money always I thinking of my brother and sisters. My maam she saying me Sally you think about yourself. keep money for yourself you will need when you go back Philippine. But my family depending on me so I keeping on sending money home. I wish my family have all nice thing like my maam family. Even if I work all my life I cannot get a home like my maam. I telling my maam that. she saying this not my home Sally I not owning it I only renting it. She not understanding my point. I cannot afford even renting home like this. I take picture of house and show it to maam and children. I telling them see I take picture of your house. Rayan is 5 year old he say no Sally you taking picture of your home. I feeling happy I belonging in this family.

Oct 3, 2010

All my sirs

My maam and sir going out of town so I am writing more. I not know when I get chance like this again so I quickly quickly finish my work and sitiing on computer. Today I tell you about my sir.

My sirs different in all places. I have total 3 sirs since I working abroad as housemaid. First sir is in Oman. He no good man. He very how you say bad not good heart. We calling him Baba. There two housemaid in that house. Me and another. Other housemaid she old she working there many year because she old she can take it. She telling me before me housemaid have affair with Baba. She leaving when her contrac over she no liking to do affair. When my Oman maam home Baba not even looking me in eye. I having leave tea cup on table in salla he coming taking tea cup no contact with me. But when maam not home he say Sally come bring tea here. Sally you want see your home in Philippine on computer. I know he not have good heart so I say no no and I go in my room quick. One day I give him tea he put his hand on my arm not good way. I tell him I complaining maam. He stopping but then I very scare. I want run away but I have to wait contrac not over. When my contrac over he also scare I will tell his wife if he make me extend contrac so he letting me go. He booking my ticket to Philippine. Ticket is very bad so many times I have to change plane. When I am leaving I telling him send my belonging Philippine by mail. He no send anything. Other housemaid tell me he throw in garbage.

My first sir in Dubai nice but too much particular. Like when they moving he making me making full inventry of all item. Every glass every CD. He also getting angry when thing breaking. He shouting lots but atleast he have good heart. Not bad man like first sir. He liking control my before maam. He telling her what to wear when they going out. He deciding all meal for dinner party. Before maam no like to make any decision she asking him what I wear today. One day my before maam is cutting her hair he not liking it. Too much controlling. But still he good.

This sir in Dubai is very nice. He very helpful to his wife my maam. He helping with children also. Actually even my maam helping with children lots. I have much less work in this house. My sir always give me salry on time. He good man best from all sir. He and maam allowing me to even use AC in house. In other places I no allow to use AC even in hot summer. I go buy fan at my other maam in Dubai and she get angry me why I buy fan. How I can stay without fan and AC. I am liking this sir most from all 3 sirs.

Oct 1, 2010

Pocketbook

I like read pocketbook. I buy for 15 dirham 4 book from Satwa when I return I can get 4 more book in same 15 dirham. Very lovely story. Today I want finish my work quickly so I can read story. It about girl who lose memory and find family after 15 year. I feel so sad but I also feel happy when she find family again. I tell my maam story. She smile and say Sally you like reading pocketbook good you are happy. My friend came back from Philipine she got lot of pocketbook. Poor friend she go Philippine think she have lot of money but she reaching there and all her money over because family spend all. She tell me no send your money to Philippine.

Money problem lot in Philippine. My maam say I cook so well I should open eating restrant. I tell her in Philippine eveyone coming in restrant saying Sally you know me I not pay you today. Then no business. Not like here you can make lot money doing business. Phone card is very good business but my maam no want me to do. My friend Lilibeth sometime also doing other business like my pant is too big so she fixing for me and I paying her 10 dirham.

Now my pocketbook over and I have nothing to read. So I will exchange in Satwa on next holiday. When I go for my day holiday my maam she no ask me any question what I buy where I go nothing. My before maam very inquistve. She want know everything. Why you buy shampoo why you buy noodle? One day she find I send box of noodle to my family in Philippine. She go tell her friend. Her friend housemaid she is my friend. she make fun of me. Now I feel embaras. Why she telling everyone I send noodle? She want check everything in my box that I am mailing to Philippine to see I not stealing any item of her. But still she better than my Oman employer. That one not even giving me old clothes or shoes. Everything go direct in garbage. Then she is checking my room to see I not take anything. I tell my friend who is housemaid next door to Oman house to take things from garbage but I no bring to my home. This maam I work for now is good she give me choice if I want bedsheet or not. When I break slipper she give me her own slipper. I feel like I working in foriner home.

Sep 29, 2010

My friend Lilibeth

My friend Lilibeth work next door neighbour. It like hotel place people coming and go. She is like how you say manager. She know how use computer and she teach me also. She very clever. Her husband also live there he drive car. Lilibeth also know how to drive. She look after plants and house. She gives me lots of flower plant and I bring them to my maam to make her happy. My maam she look at them and she say Sally you look after them I have a black thumb. What is this black thumb black thumb? her thumbs very normal I do not understand her black thumb.

So I bring flowers home and I tell maam I want go buy medicine to make plant grow. She say ok Sally do you know where should we go to buy it? I tell her Carfour because I like go to mall. My maam she never take me anywhere. One time I tell her Maam I feel like vomit in the car. From then time she never take me in car only if she have to she take me. What to do there are so many round round and so many up down. One time at before house only one time I vomit little in car. I tell maam only one time but now she not take me. Children she will take to movie or mall but I have to stay home. Sally we are just coming she say but then she does not come for 3 or 4 hours. What to do sometime I get so bored but when she going I can sit on computer. They have 4 computer. One for Sara one is maam one is sir and one is a big computer which Rayan uses. He 5 year old and has computer. Maam say that not his computer that it is whole family computer. I thinking even I part of family so I can use this computer when maam goes out and just coming back.

Lilibeth very clever. She tell me all kinds of clever things. One day she say Sally why you not go to Satwa and buy phone cards and sell, you can buy a card for 21 dirham and sell for 25 dirham. I get so excited I will go tell my maam. My maam she no like it. She tell me Sally how many cards will you buy? I tell her 10. So she say Sally you will spend more money going to Satwa and coming back and then who will you sell the cards to? Then she tell me it not legal to sell cards like this. I understand. she no want me to make extra money and do my own buziness. Suppose I get successful then I can leave her. I understand how my maam is thinking. So I give up idea. I then also thinking who will buy my cards? I am little shy I cannot go to anyone in park and say buy my cards. maybe my maam is right. But I still no like that maam say no do business.

One time my maam and sir and children go one whole month and Lilibeth show me how to use computer. Also internet. Lilibeth say I very quick learn she show me email and blog I learn how to use everything now everytime they go out I quickly finish work and I go on computer. She show me how use google. I look at pictures of my home Davao and I feel homesick.

When I tell maam I feel homesick she say even she sometime feel homesick. But it different my homesick her homesick. She have family here I only have few friend like Lilibeth. I tell her at before place if I feel homesick my maam take me for movie or mall then I feel better. But this maam no understand she no take me for movie or mall she worry I vomit in car. I even tell her sometime housemaid get depress if they getting homesick but she not say anything. Then because I upset she not listen me I bang thing in kitchen and she go sit on computer. Computer computer all time I not knowing what she do.

Lilibeth husband drive a car so sometime he give me a carlift to spinny or choitram. Like when my maam family go to vacashin before they come home I tell her maam I go choitram by taxi and get bread and milk before you come. you can pay me taxi money. Then I go with Lilibeth husband to choitram and give him 5 dirham and tell maam I pay 20 dirham for taxi. That way I do my own business no need for phone cards.

Sep 27, 2010

My life in Davao

I grow up in Davao in Philippines. Davao very beautiful place not like Manila. I wish I can show picture but I not know how to do that. When I small we are my mama and daddy and two brother and two sister. One day when I is 15 year old my daddy he leave us. We have no money. I tell my daddy give money but he have new lady now. My brother they hate my daddy but I still love him even if he not live with us. I am oldest so I want look after my brothers and sisters. My mama she not want me leave school but no choice. She send me to her friend house to work as housemaid. My mama she work in store but she feel very tired all the time she no like to work. She making me go to Manila after one years to work in factory. But I no like it so I come back to Davao.

When I am 17 I meet Richie. He really nice to me. I think I love him. I get pregnate. I feel so bad to tell my mama and my daddy but I have no choice. My daddy he very sad he have hope for my career. I also very sad I want do something for myself and my career. I want leave my child with mama but my mama very tired she say no you cannot leave child with me I want getting marry again who will marry me with so small child. So then I leave child with Richie. He nice man but I no want to marry him because drinking a lot. But I have no choice to leave my son with him. I feel sad but what to do if I want career I have to leave him. I leave him with Richie when he only 2 month. I have no choice if I have to work. I no see my child for 4 or 5 year because if I see him I feel sad and missing him.

One day I hear Filipina maid get good job oversea. I think I go work in Hong Kong Dubai Kuwait Muscat Oman. Very good pay. I contacting agency and making passport. Soon I am leaving for Oman.

In Philippine all the men no like to work. My brother they also very lazy. I send them money they use for drinking. My mama say send money for buy motorbike for brother. I send money and my brothers use motorbike whole day to take friends here there drinking. So my mama sell motorbike and use money for her own. Then I tell mother to buy pig and make them fat and sell fat pig for money. I send her money to buy pig. But when I ask her for money she say pig die. I think she sell pig and give money to new husband. He is not good man he not looking after my brothers and sisters. I have to send money for them from here. My mama have my two other child with this man and I send money all of them. Now we are 3 brother 3 sister.

But my sister Lilian she running away. One day she go and no come back. I think she have boyfriend. I in Oman that time. My mama call me on mobile tell me she not come back. My brother see Lilian boyfriend with small baby one day. He want to beat boyfriend but what use I tell him. Where is Lilian we do not know. Why she hide baby from us maybe she feel bad. But we no know if baby hers or other person. We think hers. He look just like Lili.

My daddy he die heart attak when I work in Oman. I very sad even if he not live with us and he have other lady I still love him. I cry lot when I am in my job. My brother they no cry. One day my mama phone me tell me she have operation send money. I get very scare she is going to die also. I send her money. She tie up baby part that give her baby. She say she very tire. in pain all time. I feel sad. she tell me send more money for her make well. I send lot of money home for my mama and my brother and sister.

I go back to Philippine after 2 year in Oman. I meet Richie and my son. He nearly 7 year old but he know me. Richie tell him all about me. Richie good man but I no marry him because he drink and smoke lots. But I happy Richie tell my son your mama name is Sally she work in Oman. When I tell my maam that I no marry Richie because he not responsible she say But you leave your child with him? How to tell her I no have any choice. She not understanding how my life is.

When I go back Philippine I think I stay there but then I want come back to career. So I contact agency and come back Dubai this time. I work for 2 day in one home too big too much work children crying crying all time. So I tell that maam take me back agency. Then I find other new family. My before sir in Dubai family. They very nice that maam take me to mall and movie lots of time but I have watch children lot. Lot late night party also. No family perfect I know that so I stay. I work for them one year then they moving so they transfer my visa to friend. That how I come to this maam.

Sep 23, 2010

Me and my maam

I so jealous of her. She have all nice things and me I have small room small bathroom. She have so many room so many bathroom. When she go out I use her thing her bathroom also.  I no like her sometimes. But she my maam so I have be nice to her. I have to do thing she tell me to do even when I not want.

Like two day ago I am cleaning kitchen. It 7.30 at night. My sir and maam and two children eat dinner early so I go to bed 9 oclock. It was not like that at place I work before. There they would eat dinner at 10 and I sleep 12 midnight. And get up next morning at 5 to pack school lunch. So I cleaning kitchen and maam she tell me Children will have banana pancakes tomorrow morning. Just like that. At 7 in evening. So I have to make them at night because how I can make them in the morning so quickly before they leave for school at 7.30? How she tell me at 7 to start make pancakes. When I work at the other place before I use to make 25 dishes for iftar in fasting period but I start making them early before I take the 4 children to the park but now I have to make pancake in middle of night at 7.

I very angry but what I can do I had to do pancake. So I make lot of noise when I cleaning up bang dishes and doors. My maam she not care she just go upstair and sit on computer. In morning I wake up 5.45 this famly better about these timing than  before other family and I wake up and make lots of noise again so my maam would be disturb. But she not say anything to me when she come down so I no think she hear me upstair. So next time I angry I make more noise again.

Yesterday while I wash windows my slipper broke so maam gave me her slipper. I take them even though she haves a big foot and my foot little smaller. She say Do they fit? You can have them. They were little big but I take them because they nice. Now my feet hurt. Why she give me big slippers? Why she not give me smaller ones? I tell her Maam your slippers make my feet hurt. She say Because they are big I think. But what I can do the slippers are really nice. Maybe she gave me because her feet hurt in them. But she used to wear them and no complaining they hurt. Maybe her feet are big so they no hurt her. 

My friend Lilibeth she work next door say if you have big feet your balance better so they no hurt. Lilibeth very clever. She tell me lot of important things. Like she tell me not to have bath in evening because if you do then you get what you say paralize. Really. So now I wake up 5.45 early morning to take shower before children coming down for breakfast. Maam wake up at 6 and then she looks at children lunchbox to see if I put everything in it proper. She say Sara like tuna Rayan like chicken make sure you have give right sandwich. As though I would put wrong sandwich in wrong box. Maybe once I put wrong snack in wrong bag and Rayan get full strawberry instead of cut strawberry. Maam tell me with smile Rayan only 5 years old Sally he need strawberry chop.

Maam think very important this kind of thing. I think atleast he getting strawberry. My brothers and sisters in Philippine they no get anything. These children of my maam and sir are so lucky they have so many toys and thing I so jealous of them